Disappointed - 1st school week 2011

the shit thing is this week was ...
the teachers FFG me ... bad impression ...
don’t know why, or maybe I really sot already,
so obedient and attend classes even 8am.
Who knows, teachers didn’t come,
somehow even notice also doesn’t have.
annoying about that also useless,
so just can back to my room (luckily not damn far).
hmm ... not very satisfy the time table for this semester,
Wednesday only have 1 hour class,
somemore in 11am. what an unusual time ...
Friday as well, till 2pm only has 2 hours class ...
what a stupid arrangement ...
the subjects for this semester almost make me faint ...
still considering am I right in choosing this course ...
all I know it studies a lot of thing while I may be can’t afford it ...


meanwhile because of my bad result,
the scholarship has been terminated ...
what a big “present” for me ...
I’m sure that my parent very disappointed
for my performance ... haiz ...
all I can see in my result is my level
just keep dropping and dropping ...
think once to end my uni studies and go work ...
but now-a-day, the requirement for good job
almost included the degree cert ...
the situation just exactly like last century,
without SPM cert you may not able to get
a nice pay even has quite many years experience ...
everyone has different opinion in mind ...
some may think that you are not professional enough
to work under his or her department without a degree cert ...
therefore, all I can do just continue my studies and work harder ...
hope may make it better ...


on the other hand, I am trying to do a good job in freelance style ...
all I hope just help in our family financial position ...
the primary school keep adding this loading and that loading ...
the secondary school fees getting higher and higher ...
so worry that my parent need work overtime
to earn more to pay for our education fees and life expenses ...
really hope that myself can handle my own expenses by my limited knowledge ...
so that the monthly expenses they give me
can be used to pay the tuition fees even accommodation fees ...
in this condition, I have no reason to stay that perfect room ...
therefore , now just hope that has room to change ...


this time , I really felt disappointed and hopeless
for my performance during the two semesters in last year ...
as my word , I am not a good person that you think about ...
although the caring that I hope from you getting more and more ...
but I know there has no way turn back to the initial feeling ...
as I really did a bad job and not responsible enough to you ...
anyway I still will keep my promise long-lasting whenever u need it ...
apologize for my false as well I will try to correct it ...